New Beginning (Decision Points part 1)
by infiniteworld8
Summary: McCoy has nothing left. His wife left him. His daughter now lives with his sister. Everyday he falls deeper into despair and nothing seems to matter any more. A friend makes him an offer he'll never take. He hates space, it's a death trap, no oxygen, no life, planets filled with toxins, Starfleet is not for him...but it just might be a chance for a new beginning.
1. Betrayed

Disclaimer: I do not own star trek

**This story I wrote to provide a little more backstory for why acts the way he does. I feel that they never really explained why he and Spock clashed so much or why he left his daughter with his sister back on Earth. To better understand this story please read chapter two of worst memories. read and review. more reviews equal faster updates! on a related note the star trek story I'm working on is nearly finished and currently around 20,000 words it'll probably top out at 25,000. the story will expound on the stories presented in worst memories and decision points, and will be one of a series of stories.**

_Note: This story takes place after the memory described in chapter 2 of my fanfic story worst memories._

Dr. McCoy

"Beep"

McCoy blearily reached a hand down to find the source of the incessant beeping that had awoken him from his drunken stupor. His fingers brushed dirty clothes, dishes, half-empty fast food containers before landing on the source of the annoying noise: a data Padd. He picked the module up and squinted at the screen, a message that said "URGENT" was flashing across the screen. McCoy pressed a finger to the open icon on the tablet and was greeted with a message informing him that he was being evicted from his apartment. McCoy deleted the message and tossed the Padd aside.

Every day it seemed like he had gotten a message and all of them had been bad. One, message he had received several days ago was from the hospital network that he worked for, terminating him for his months' long absence without notice. And he had received several messages from bill collectors, because Jocelyn had somehow during the divorce managed to shift almost all the assets to herself and all the debts to him. Another had been from Jocelyn demanding that he return her wedding ring. The ring was his grandmother's and Jocelyn had hardly ever worn it, in fact she had thrown it at his feet the day she left. He clearly remembered that day.

_He had come home from work to find her packing in their bedroom._

"_What are you doing?"_

"_What does it look like I'm doing? I'm leaving" she said without turning around. He watched as she angrily shoved another piece of clothing into her bag._

"_We can work this out, you don't have to-"he began_

"_No we can't work this out" she turned around her face furious. " what? you want us to go talk, you want me to sit down and say I'm sorry, get some counseling and everything can go back to the way it was" _

"_I'm saying we can stay together, I forgive you, I"_

"_you forgive me" she spat the words out then snorted, "I should be the one forgiving you, you left me here day after day, Dr. McCoy, the hotshot doctor off for another day at work saving lives, and me stuck at home"_

"_You have a job, I never made you-"_

"_you never let me be myself either, you expected something I'm not, I can't be your mother, or your sisters, your aunts, I can't be that perfect wife that bakes and cooks and cleans and doesn't have a life of her own, that's not me"_

_McCoy was at a loss for words_

"_I want a life, Leonard, a real career, I want some personal satisfaction, and you want some 19__th__ century fairytale."_

"_We can work this out, what about Joanna"_

"_What about her?" She looked at him tears of anger trickling down her face. "You wanted her, I never wanted kids, let's have a child you said over and over, you practically made me have her, and half the time you don't even have time for her."_

_Jocelyn turned away from him, and finished stuffing the last of stuff into her bag._

"_You don't have to leave"_

"_I do" she picked up her bag, and slung it over her shoulder. _

_She turned and walked toward the door her hand was on the doorknob, when he asked her:_

"_Why are you doing this?"_

"_Why am I doing this?" She turned and looked at him one last time. "That's not the question you need to ask. Ask yourself why you did this"_

_He stared at her wondering what had become of the woman he married._

" _it's over Leonard, I've filed the papers for divorce , I gave you the custody and full parental rights for Joanna, I'm done" She pulled her wedding ring, off her finger and threw it at his feet, then she was gone._

_McCoy leaned over and picked up the gold band and stood there staring at it, for what seemed like several minutes, he looked up as he heard a small sob, Joanna was standing there, Oh god, he hadn't even known she was home., how much had she heard?. She looked up at him her face streaked with tears and utterly miserable. "Mommy's gone" she said her voice muffled with tears, McCoy looked at her he had nothing to say that would make it better, instead he scooped up the crying girl, and held her, one hand twined in her hair, as she cried into his shoulder, the other staring at the ring in his hand, it was cold with the feeling of betrayal._

The memory of that day still lingered. McCoy pulled himself off the couch, where he had sprawled last night after drinking nearly half a bottle of whiskey. At the moment he wanted nothing more than to stay there for several more hours, but his body cried out for what he had gotten use to: alcohol. A few months ago he would have felt a lot worse from imbibing such a large quantity of alcohol; now his body had gotten use to the punishment, all he had was a headache and that would eventually go away when he had a drink.

McCoy walked toward the counter of the kitchenette in his one room apartment, stumbling several times as he picked his way through the litter scattered across the room floor. He reached the counter and grabbed a bottle of brandy and a slightly filthy glass; he poured himself a glass and took a long swallow. He finished the glass and had raised the bottle to his lips for another drink when the door rang, startling him for a moment. ; He ignored it and took another draught.

"Leonard I know you're in there" a voice rang out, this time, accompanying the door buzzer. McCoy recognized the voice as that of Abraham Giezel, a neurologist at one of the hospitals McCoy worked, _had worked_ he amended himself remembering the termination message he had received. The door buzzer rang out again accompanied by Dr. Abraham's insistent voice "Open up Leonard, I'm perfectly prepared to stand outside your door all day"

McCoy set the bottle of brandy down with a sigh and moved toward the door, he had known Abraham for several years and the neurologist was nothing if not persistent.

McCoy unlocked the door and pulled it open just as the neurologist was about to call out again, his aborted yell was changed into a startled reply of "you look like Sh-!" McCoy gave a grunt, and then said "what do you want?"

The neurologist replied "For you to stop wallowing in a pool of self-pity and to start living again"

McCoy's acerbic rhetorical question of "And just how should I do that?" was answered literally by Dr. Abraham as he pushed his way past Dr. McCoy and into the apartment.

"First you could start by cleaning up, you look like you haven't bathed in days", Dr. Abraham said looking at his friend. McCoy had several weeks' worth of beard growth on his face, his clothes were dirty and overlarge, his eyes were bloodshot and his face was fatigued.

"Second" the doctor continued as he removed the remains of a pizza from the bottom of his shoe, with a look of disgust "You could clean up this place and third you could come out with me for a cup of coffee"

"Abraham, I-"McCoy began seriously irritated with the neurologist's comments

"I'm not taking No for an answer" Abraham said cutting McCoy off.

"I'm not going any-"McCoy began again crossly.

"Leonard, you're a drunk" Abraham said looking at McCoy seriously.

"I want you to leave, now! " McCoy yelled angrily.

" I'm not going to" the neurologist said " this places reeks of alcohol, you smell of it, you look like one of the bums we used to see in the ER; You're not taking care of yourself"

"What I do is my own business, so what I'm not taking care of myself" McCoy shouted furiously.

Abraham looked at his friend who obviously wasn't taking his plight seriously enough, and decided to go with his last straw it was a low blow, but if it would make McCoy stop screwing up his life it was worth it.

"You weren't taking care of Joanna either" said Abraham, who was the godfather of McCoy's daughter.

"Don't you ever tell me, one F-ing thing about how I wasn't taking care of her" McCoy yelled furiously advancing on the small neurologist his face livid. "I'm the only one that was taking care of her"

The neurologist stood his ground "You weren't taking care of her, I heard about how you gave Joanna to your sister after were so drunk one night you passed out on the couch and she nearly drowned herself"

At this last comment, all the fight went out of McCoy. He slumped into a chair at the cluttered table in the apartment, his head in his hands. In spite of the drunken haze he had been in McCoy remembered the events of that night very clearly _He had had awoken from his drunken stupor, some indefinable sense telling him that something was wrong. He had gone to the back door of the house they were renting and found the door open. He walked outside into the backyard and found Joanna floating face down in the small pond behind the house, one of the small boats she played with floating next to her. He had waded in and pulled her out, her weight was so heavy and lifeless in his arms, cold tendrils of water dripped off her soaked hair and clothes. He had laid her on the bank and tried to resuscitate her and after what had seemed like hours, he was rewarded with a small shuddering breath and a cough... He had been so close to losing her._

Abraham placed a hand on his friend's shoulder and said "Leonard you're a good a man and a brilliant doctor, I'm not going to let you screw up your life"

McCoy looked up at this comment, his eyes were bloodshot and tired, his face looked aged beyond his years, he was a pitiful sight. Abraham looked down at his friend, refusing to feel pity and said "Now, get up and pull yourself together"


	2. All that's lost

30 minutes later, when McCoy had emerged from the bathroom, he had showered, shaved and put on clean clothes. Dr. Abraham was just finishing putting the final touches on a hasty cleaning job that had largely consisted of removing all the alcohol bottles and fast-food containers and bundling the rubbish into the disposal chute. Abraham pulled one last half-full bottle of bourbon from where it was laying half-way tucked underneath the couch and tossed it before turning around to look at his friend. McCoy looked better than he had when he first saw him, he had cleaned himself up, but the neglect he had shown himself in the past few months showed. His face was worn-out and thin, his clothes hung off him, a testament to too many "liquid" meals, and he had a general air of exhaustion. Abraham' forced a smile as he looked at his friend and said "Let's go"

McCoy looked around the café they were in feeling uncomfortable in the crowd of people. There were too many people, humans and other races who were, ordering beverages, eating and fooling around on data pads. He hadn't left his apartment in over a week and then it had been to buy more alcohol, he wasn't ready for this. He started as something ran past his table, it was a little girl. He watched as the little girl, who looked a lot like Joanna ran up to a man and pulled herself up into his lap , the women sitting next to the man laughed and tickled the girl. _The scene reminded him of when he and Jocelyn used to take Joanna out._ McCoy turned away from the sight blinking furiously, _why did he crave another drink all of a sudden?_

"Leonard?" Abraham's voice pulled him back from his reflection

"Hmm?" McCoy replied glancing at the neurologist who was pulling apart a large pastry, the girl's giggles filled the background, cutting into McCoy. _He remembered how Joanna would giggle, when he picked her up and swung her around. _

"I was saying, do you have any plans?'

"No... Not really" McCoy said distractedly, thinking unless getting drunk every night, so you didn't have to deal with reality counted. He glanced over at the table as the girl climbed down and started scrambling after a ball she had dropped. Her tongue tucked in the corner of her mouth, _just like Joanna had when she was concentrating on something._

"Leonard, I was thinking, and I want you to hear me out" Abraham said continuing, not noticing his friend's attention was elsewhere.

" Okay" McCoy said vaguely feeling an almost physical pain, watching the girl as she grabbed for the ball and it rolled farther way, a lock of hair had fallen into her face and she brushed it away impatiently with the back of her hand, _just like Joanna._

"I have some connections" Abrahams said oblivious to the fact that McCoy wasn't even paying him any attention. "And I think-"

"Damn it, can't you control your kid!" McCoy yelled losing it, he stood up, knocking his chair backwards, as the girl who was still chasing after her ball, bumped into him as she tried to pick up her ball which had rolled near his foot. All heads in the café turned to look at him, and the noise level dropped precipitously. " People should be able to F-king go somewhere without someone's F-king kid bothering them" he shouted, the girl looked startled then started crying, _her face screwing itself up just like Joanna's_, McCoy looked down at her and muttered "Sh-", then strode out of the café, all of the patrons staring at him.

Abraham hastily dropped some money on the table as the mother went to console the girl while simultaneously trying to prevent her husband from following after McCoy. The noise in the restaurant went back up as all of the patrons started talking about McCoy.

"What a jerk"

"Somebody should tell the manager and that bastard shouldn't be allowed in here anymore"

"Hey, somebody needs to tell your friend to get an attitude adjustment before he gets his ass kick-"

Abraham was outside the café before the man could finish the rest of his comment, he looked around for McCoy who was nowhere in sight. After searching everywhere, He finally found him almost two hours later staring out over the edge of a bridge, one hand resting over the edge, the other holding an open half-full bottle of whiskey. As Abraham watched Dr. McCoy took another swig.

Abraham walked up to his friend; McCoy turned around and glanced at the neurologist, and said "Come to chastise me?' his voice was surprisingly sober for the quantity of alcohol he must have drank. Before the neurologist could reply, McCoy had continued reflectively, glancing at the bottle he held in his hand "you know… I just can't seem to get drunk"

"Give me the bottle, Leonard" Abraham said softly, holding out his hand.

McCoy looked at the bottle briefly considering, and Abraham thought he would refuse, then he passed it over to the neurologist, with a sigh.

"I'm a failure as a husband, as a father, everything" McCoy said turning towards Abraham his voice miserable, his shoulders slumped.

Abrahms looked at McCoy and recognized that he was drunk, only he hadn't drunk himself into the stupor that Abraham suspected he had taken to medicating himself into. Instead, he had only drank enough to change his mood into its current depressive state. Abraham wondered what McCoy would have done on the deserted bridge if Abraham hadn't found him when he had, in McCoy's present mood who knew what he had been contemplating.

"Come on Leonard" he said as he started walking

McCoy followed behind dejectedly

20 minutes later they were both seated on a park bench, Abraham had gotten them both coffee and opted to drink it outside to avoid any scenes like earlier.

"Leonard you can't go on drinking yourself into oblivion everyday" Abraham said

McCoy made no reply his fingers toying with the rim of his cup.

"You want to get away, and alcohol isn't the way to do it"

"I wasn't try-"McCoy began gloomily

" You were" Abraham said firmly " I have an idea and I want you to hear me out, Starfleet is looking for doctors, you could apply, I've got some connections you could get way from this whole situation, start over"

"I don't want to go into space" McCoy said

"Then what the hell do you want?, you want me to leave you alone and let you drink yourself to death or get so low that one day you kill yourself?" Abraham said angrily

McCoy had no answer for the doctor.

"Plus" Abraham muttered half-way under his breath "you could get away from that bitch, I hear she's trying to get alimony"  
McCoy opened his mouth to ask how Abraham knew that then stopped, people in the medical field were the worst gossips.

"I can understand how Jocelyn feels" McCoy said utterly depressed. "I never took her feelings into consideration, I wasn't-"

" Damn it, McCoy she's really pulled a guilt trip on you hasn't she, that bit- has got you believing that it's all your fault that she didn't have the common decency to just divorce you, .she cheated on you in your own house, took all the money, disowned her daughter and she's got you feeling guilty!" Abraham's took a sip of his coffee and said "That lying, manipulative, little bit-"

Abraham glowered darkly into his cup for a moment before saying

" Look Leonard unless you make some big changes, you're going to wind up a drunk, homeless bum on the street, you know it, I know it" Abraham continued " you need to get away from here, get away from all these places and people you know and start completely over, and Starfleet is your chance"


	3. Another path

Chapter 3

It was late when McCoy finally got home; he was sitting on the couch with a freshly purchased bottle of liquor in his hand contemplating whether he really wanted to drink it. Unfortunately, in this case his months long habit, won out against any of the admonitions Abraham had been pestering him with all day. Surrendering to the urge , he opened the bottle and took a swig. He didn't get any pleasure out of his actions. He drank more out of necessity than anything, it was the only thing that numbed his mind enough so he didn't have to think about how screwed up his life really was.

Taking another swallow, he turned the TV on and absentmindedly flicked through channels, he finally tossed the remote to the side, not really caring what channel he was on. He drank and half-listened to the commercials as they flashed across the screen. Idiots, he snorted as he heard yet, another commercial offering some idiotic miracle drug to cure another one of the ailments that people for time in memorial had been diagnosing themselves with. He took another drink and felt himself starting to sink into the usual semi-stuporous state that made his reality more bearable, in the back ground another commercial started up.

"Are you looking for a way to achieve your full potential?"

_He already had achieved his full potential; he was loser, a failure at having a family being a father, and a husband"_

"Do you want to help others and make the galaxy a better place for all species?"

_Whoever wanted to make the galaxy a better place for all species was an idiot, some species didn't deserve anything to be better for them especially those damn vulcans. And as for helping others according to Jocelyn he had done too much of that and that was why he had lost his family._

"Do you want an opportunity for discovery and personal growth?"

_He'd discovered all he wanted to, he discovered his wife with that damn Vulcan and apparently she had experienced a lot of personal growth. She had grown away from him._

"Then Starfleet is your chance"

Damn it even the TV was talking to him now. He straightened up and opened his eyes and was in time to see the last of the commercial as a list of recruiting offices were listed.

_Starfleet is your chance_

The words echoed is his mind, paralleling what Abraham's had said earlier, He looked down at the bottle in his hand, was this some kind of message from some higher being, or was he seeing coincidence in ordinary things, due to his inebriated state.

It didn't matter, it felt like those last words had been for him, or maybe something in him wanted to change, either way he put down the bottle and dialed Abraham Giezel.

"Hello… Leonard?, Do you know what time it is" The neurologist sounded sleepy, in the back ground he could hear a woman's voice asking "who is it?." "_Leonard dear", _Abraham's voice said sounding muffled. In a baby started crying. "Ah, the baby's awake " the woman's voice said sounding resigned.

"Leonard you still there" said Abraham

"Yes" McCoy replied

"Why did you call? is everything okay?" Abraham's said sounding apprehensive

"It's Nothing, I just wanted to ask you is the offer still open"

"What offer?" Abraham said yawning

"I want to join Starfleet"

"You? …Want to join Starfleet?"

"Yes,"

"Well, I'll be over in-"There was a pause as he Abraham consulted a clock "3 hours, the office nearest you opens at 0600"

There was a pause as, Abraham's waited for McCoy to speak, McCoy was still in shock, he couldn't really believe that he had just made the decision he had.

"You're making the right decision" Abraham said breaking the silence.

"I know, Starfleet is my chance" McCoy said the words feeling right even as he said them.

XXXX XXXX

One month later

Dr. McCoy hurried down the path to where the shuttles waited that would take them to Starfleet academy. Mentally he cursed the alien he had gotten instructions from; this was the third time he had gotten lost.

As he rounded a corner and reached a crowd of people all dressed in the same uniform he was, he assumed he was going in the right direction. A minute later his assumption was confirmed as the shuttles came into view, they were large and yet, to his way of thinking flimsy looking. _What the hell were they thinking that those things were made to fly, much less go into space_? His mind ran over all the statistics for death in shuttles, asphyxiation, embolization, stroke, heart attacks, life-support failure, decompression, the list was numerous, and each way was more painful than the next. Was he crazy, did he really have a death wish? Why was he about to go onto a death trap much less train for a few years to become a doctor on another death trap?

He was about to get cold feet when another person bumped into causing his bag to split open and spilling stuff out, the green-skinned girl hurried past him unaware of what she had done. He would have said something to her, but, she had already disappeared into the crowd. Grumbling McCoy leaned down to pick the stuff up,. He planned to grab his stuff, then he would go back and tell Giezel that this wasn't a good idea, space and him just didn't go together. He stuffed, books, papers in the bag, his fingers pausing as he saw a card, it said G_ud luck daddy !_ and was sprawled across a blue background in a child's untidy writing. It was a card from Joanna. He had been to see her several times before he had left. The last visit with her, his sister had made him a going away dinner and Joanna had presented him the card being sure to point out to him exactly where and why she had used glitter and numerous stickers. The sight of the card, banished his doubts. He thought of his daughter who meant so much to him. She was one of the main reasons he was going into Starfleet so he could change and become a better person. A better father. She deserved that. He shoved the rest of the stuff in his bag and put Joanna's card in the pocket of his uniform. He straightened up and walked toward the shuttle.

Toward a new beginning.

_Starfleet was his chance._

**Hope you enjoyed 's "decision point" be prepared for another one coming soon. I won't tell you which character, but just so you know I plan on writing the "decision points" for almost all the characters except Spock and Kirk since I felt the movie really explained it well. Anyway this story will only have two decision points then a little later in the year I'll have a part two with other characters decision points. **

**This story and my other story worst memories are actually almost like a little teaser or backstory to a much longer story that is currently around 40,000 words (it'll probably top out at 50,000, but may be more because stuff keeps happening to the characters that I didn't expect). The story will most likely be finished by the end of this month to early next month.**

**For anybody that's wondering I only post a story when I've already written the entire thing. So, I really only post a chapter or two at a time because I hope to get reviews. if you like my work and want more faster (yes , I would consider posting several chapters a week, even) then read and review!**

**I'd love to know what you think do you love it or hate it? Do you think I'm capturing the characters? Taking to many liberties with the canon? Tell me what you think! and THANKS to the people that took the time to read and review!**


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